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	<title>Comments on: Cats Are Not Our Friends</title>
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	<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/</link>
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		<title>By: Mike</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-127</link>
		<dc:creator>Mike</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 Apr 2009 16:43:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-127</guid>
		<description>Cats are by far the manliest of housepets.  Male cats, in particular, sleep most of the day and run around most of the night, hunting, fighting, and chasing...er, female cats.  If they drank beer, they would be guys.  And, really, you can&#039;t fault them for preferring herbal refreshment.  Don&#039;t you listen to Pure Prairie League? (&quot;You&#039;re better with a joint than with a drink, I think.&quot;)
Female cats have many of the same attributes, plus they&#039;re sluts.

Cats are more complicated than dogs, it&#039;s true, but much lower maintenance. You don&#039;t have to follow them down the street with a baggie, just clean their litter box 2-3 times a week.  One of mine never did get the hang of the litter box.  His was a different kind of intelligence--a special kind.  He was clever enough to figure out what people did in the little room that smelled funny, afterwards, but it never occurred to him that we were pooping in the drinking bowl.  So he used the shower.  Kind of a revolting discovery, but you soon look to look before you step, and it wasn&#039;t hard to clean up.  Besides, he mostly used the neighbors&#039; flower beds.

Cats are generally drawn to the most sedentary person in the household.
I respect that about them, although it can be a little troublesome to get up to go to the bathroom or get a snack from the fridge when you are all covered up in a pile of cats.  But if you wait awhile, they usually wander off.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Cats are by far the manliest of housepets.  Male cats, in particular, sleep most of the day and run around most of the night, hunting, fighting, and chasing&#8230;er, female cats.  If they drank beer, they would be guys.  And, really, you can&#8217;t fault them for preferring herbal refreshment.  Don&#8217;t you listen to Pure Prairie League? (&#8220;You&#8217;re better with a joint than with a drink, I think.&#8221;)<br />
Female cats have many of the same attributes, plus they&#8217;re sluts.</p>
<p>Cats are more complicated than dogs, it&#8217;s true, but much lower maintenance. You don&#8217;t have to follow them down the street with a baggie, just clean their litter box 2-3 times a week.  One of mine never did get the hang of the litter box.  His was a different kind of intelligence&#8211;a special kind.  He was clever enough to figure out what people did in the little room that smelled funny, afterwards, but it never occurred to him that we were pooping in the drinking bowl.  So he used the shower.  Kind of a revolting discovery, but you soon look to look before you step, and it wasn&#8217;t hard to clean up.  Besides, he mostly used the neighbors&#8217; flower beds.</p>
<p>Cats are generally drawn to the most sedentary person in the household.<br />
I respect that about them, although it can be a little troublesome to get up to go to the bathroom or get a snack from the fridge when you are all covered up in a pile of cats.  But if you wait awhile, they usually wander off.</p>
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		<title>By: Daniel Brown</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-47</link>
		<dc:creator>Daniel Brown</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Mar 2009 23:15:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-47</guid>
		<description>Agree with everything, but I&#039;ve experienced something that&#039;s not in the write-up which happened to me (again) about a year ago.

Friend of mine has (what I have to admit is) a BEAUTIFUL cat (Abyssinian). She wandered over to me, meandering as she approached, so I put my hand out. She gave it a dab of &quot;cat face juice&quot;, and rubbed her side against my hand. I gave her a little scratch behind the ears, around the neck - all things I&#039;ve experienced to be likable to cats. We were getting along swimmingly until all of a sudden, she just lost her shit and bit me. Suddenly, we were &quot;done&quot;.

Sorry, can&#039;t tolerate a species that can turn on you like that. A dog (usually) needs to feel threatened or cornered, but at least they will growl before unleashing (so to speak) hell.

And, yes, sick of people with their &quot;you don&#039;t know MY cat&quot;. Yes, I do. Tens of millions of years of evolution didn&#039;t spin of a custom version for you. It&#039;s the same animal.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Agree with everything, but I&#8217;ve experienced something that&#8217;s not in the write-up which happened to me (again) about a year ago.</p>
<p>Friend of mine has (what I have to admit is) a BEAUTIFUL cat (Abyssinian). She wandered over to me, meandering as she approached, so I put my hand out. She gave it a dab of &#8220;cat face juice&#8221;, and rubbed her side against my hand. I gave her a little scratch behind the ears, around the neck &#8211; all things I&#8217;ve experienced to be likable to cats. We were getting along swimmingly until all of a sudden, she just lost her shit and bit me. Suddenly, we were &#8220;done&#8221;.</p>
<p>Sorry, can&#8217;t tolerate a species that can turn on you like that. A dog (usually) needs to feel threatened or cornered, but at least they will growl before unleashing (so to speak) hell.</p>
<p>And, yes, sick of people with their &#8220;you don&#8217;t know MY cat&#8221;. Yes, I do. Tens of millions of years of evolution didn&#8217;t spin of a custom version for you. It&#8217;s the same animal.</p>
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		<title>By: Jill</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-29</link>
		<dc:creator>Jill</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Mar 2009 13:36:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-29</guid>
		<description>&quot;....like living with the French&quot; - LMAO!!!!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;&#8230;.like living with the French&#8221; &#8211; LMAO!!!!</p>
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		<title>By: Mister Tindall</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-28</link>
		<dc:creator>Mister Tindall</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Mar 2009 12:18:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-28</guid>
		<description>I know my cat plots against me.  I can see it in his eyes.

I can see that when he&#039;s licking himself, he&#039;s really thinking about how delicious his revenge against me will be.  I know this is all my fault, but how was I supposed to know that shooting him with rubber bands while he was a sleeping kitten would make him grow up to be such a monster?

I now know what I must do.  The real question is, General Tso&#039;s or Kung Pao?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I know my cat plots against me.  I can see it in his eyes.</p>
<p>I can see that when he&#8217;s licking himself, he&#8217;s really thinking about how delicious his revenge against me will be.  I know this is all my fault, but how was I supposed to know that shooting him with rubber bands while he was a sleeping kitten would make him grow up to be such a monster?</p>
<p>I now know what I must do.  The real question is, General Tso&#8217;s or Kung Pao?</p>
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		<title>By: Tiff</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-27</link>
		<dc:creator>Tiff</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 29 Mar 2009 12:36:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-27</guid>
		<description>Cats are amusing, the three minutes a day they&#039;re awake.

Dogs are amusing, as long as the garbage can is under lock and key.

Both shed, shit, and get in your way.  To me, it&#039;s a toss-up.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Cats are amusing, the three minutes a day they&#8217;re awake.</p>
<p>Dogs are amusing, as long as the garbage can is under lock and key.</p>
<p>Both shed, shit, and get in your way.  To me, it&#8217;s a toss-up.</p>
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		<title>By: Ratrace</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-25</link>
		<dc:creator>Ratrace</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 29 Mar 2009 02:18:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-25</guid>
		<description>A comment on the whole site though the Madonna mock should have it&#039;s own, what a feak job! I love this site, mocking those that need it is absolutely essential! One wish would be that those of us that are not the &quot;professional&quot; mockers ought to be allowed to do our own mockage of those that need mocking, sort of a readers contribution mock link, whatcha think?

Ratrace
Salem, Oregon</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A comment on the whole site though the Madonna mock should have it&#8217;s own, what a feak job! I love this site, mocking those that need it is absolutely essential! One wish would be that those of us that are not the &#8220;professional&#8221; mockers ought to be allowed to do our own mockage of those that need mocking, sort of a readers contribution mock link, whatcha think?</p>
<p>Ratrace<br />
Salem, Oregon</p>
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		<title>By: DCinCinci</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-20</link>
		<dc:creator>DCinCinci</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Mar 2009 15:32:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-20</guid>
		<description>I&#039;ve had both as pets and love both as pets.

Good luck on the new site!

It&#039;s not been my experience that cats aren&#039;t affectionate. Mine have always greeted me at the door when I come home. 
Our one cat kept vigil at my father&#039;s side as he slowly slipped away from us.

The only one that was a bit standoffish had been abused by a previous owner.

I do find it odd that people that label themselves as cat people love dogs too.
But many dog people dispise cats.

Have whatever pet floats your boat. They really add a lot to our lives.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;ve had both as pets and love both as pets.</p>
<p>Good luck on the new site!</p>
<p>It&#8217;s not been my experience that cats aren&#8217;t affectionate. Mine have always greeted me at the door when I come home.<br />
Our one cat kept vigil at my father&#8217;s side as he slowly slipped away from us.</p>
<p>The only one that was a bit standoffish had been abused by a previous owner.</p>
<p>I do find it odd that people that label themselves as cat people love dogs too.<br />
But many dog people dispise cats.</p>
<p>Have whatever pet floats your boat. They really add a lot to our lives.</p>
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		<title>By: Currage</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-18</link>
		<dc:creator>Currage</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Mar 2009 13:12:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-18</guid>
		<description>I find it odd that most cat people argue this observation by saying, &quot;Oh, my cat is different!&quot;. They don&#039;t argue the general stereotype of cats. They just think that they have some miraculous animal that looks like a cat but acts like a dog.  How special!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I find it odd that most cat people argue this observation by saying, &#8220;Oh, my cat is different!&#8221;. They don&#8217;t argue the general stereotype of cats. They just think that they have some miraculous animal that looks like a cat but acts like a dog.  How special!</p>
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		<title>By: mountie9wv</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-16</link>
		<dc:creator>mountie9wv</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Mar 2009 04:13:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-16</guid>
		<description>When those cats are doing those figure eights and being all purrly (that&#039;s a word), they are really wiping their ass on your pants.  Watch closely next time.  Heathens, I say.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>When those cats are doing those figure eights and being all purrly (that&#8217;s a word), they are really wiping their ass on your pants.  Watch closely next time.  Heathens, I say.</p>
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		<title>By: Nezrite</title>
		<link>http://mockable.org/cats-are-not-our-friends/#comment-15</link>
		<dc:creator>Nezrite</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Mar 2009 03:27:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mockable.org/?p=71#comment-15</guid>
		<description>I prefer dogs, but then I read this statistic today:  86,000 people a year trip over their pets, and 88% of those tripper-pets are dogs.  Is it that cats know enough to get the hell out of your way?  I personally have an effed-up right arm, shoulder, neck and back from a middle-of-the-night return trip from the throne room that ended in me sprawled beside my bed and a confused Rottweiler wondering when exactly I&#039;d get out of his way and let him get back to sleep.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I prefer dogs, but then I read this statistic today:  86,000 people a year trip over their pets, and 88% of those tripper-pets are dogs.  Is it that cats know enough to get the hell out of your way?  I personally have an effed-up right arm, shoulder, neck and back from a middle-of-the-night return trip from the throne room that ended in me sprawled beside my bed and a confused Rottweiler wondering when exactly I&#8217;d get out of his way and let him get back to sleep.</p>
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