Site News
2011 June 2

Hey guys. I am going through some pretty major life changes (finally, the big change…I can’t wait for my voice to get lower!) at the moment. Also, there are tornadoes, homicides and other real life stuff in the way…so I decided to take the week off. Things will be back to normalish on Monday. We have a new one from Caveboy, a new Thursday columnist, a Friday guest mock and Lakr might even write something for Wednesday…the prick (just kidding…luv you lakr…don’t get all pissed again…). So anyway, wish me luck…and we’ll see you all on Monday.
Oh Christ.
I had this dream where I could see Snuffy from Sesame Street, just his head sticking out of the door. And he was grunting and he said, “Scram Farty. You don’t want no part of this shit.” But instead of running away I walked closer and poked my head in the door. There I saw Big Bird fucking Snuffy in the anus with a large strap-on bird cock.
In the background was Elmo. He had hung himself, and shit all over the floor. Then I heard Christopher Walken saying, “You don’t want no part of this shit, boy.” I looked around for him but finally figured out that he was the one wearing the Big Bird suit. I asked him why he was fucking Snuffy and he said, “Look man. I gotta wedding to go to. Get the hell out of here.” Then he put a shotgun in his mouth and pulled the trigger.
So I guess I’m going to buy some lottery tickets.
Shit.shit.shit.shit.