The Horribly Ridiculous Website of the Month

2009 April 24
by mockers
Yo baby, I got what you need...unless you need chest hair for some reason

Yo baby, I got what you need...unless, for some reason, you need chest hair

Meet the A-man.  In case you didn’t notice…he’s a douche.  I first met the A-man back in the early part of the century when I wrote this anti-advice column.  Perhaps I was a bit too harsh when I encouraged him to commit suicide, so I guess I am sort of glad that he didn’t.  I mean, kinda.

Five or six years later, he’s still going strong.  He’s giving shitty advice to people that don’t exist, posting embarrassing pictures of himself, pretending like he has a “staff” that fears and admires him and failing to break the 6,000,000 mark in Alexa ratings. I wonder what the A-man actually does for a living, since it’s clear that his shitty website isn’t a source of income.  Do you think he’s working in somebody’s mail room with his purple shirt open like that?   He’s got to be pretty well off to afford to employ all those people who don’t create any content.  But really, who is “The man”? He’s our boss and the host of this entertainment web site. Please don’t make him mad at us. He’s a huge pain-in-the-ass to work for when he’s mad at one of us. We fear him *shudder*.”
Yes, I could see how working for the “A-man” could be a very intimidating process.  I looks like if you cross him he might take you on an adventure to our nation’s capital where you’ll be posed against your will in front of historic monuments and made to stare at the camera all tough and serious like you’re a member of Orlano’s newest boy band.
I leave you with a challenge mockateers – go out into the internet and find me a bigger self-absorbed, self promoting douchewhore than this guy.  Doesn’t he look like he just farted one of the gayest farts to ever get farted?
Yes, fear me.  Because I just farted in the gayest possible way.Pictures and graphics used without permission.
8 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 April 24

    I think he might actually be Cute with Chris.

  2. 2009 April 24

    Did I see him with O-Town or Making the band???

  3. 2009 April 24
    Bill, just Bill permalink

    I’ll take that challenge. I think this dude is the biggest taint-stain in all of douchedom. But before you click on the link, be aware that you will likely want to punch a kitten in the face afterwards.

    You’ve been warned.

  4. 2009 April 24
    mockers permalink

    He could be that much of a self-absorbed douche, he barely bought any bandwidth…

  5. 2009 April 25
    hardoxdan permalink

    I think that is Obama with photoshopped white skin. Nobody else has ears that big.

  6. 2009 April 26
    sharon permalink

    Bill. Arthur must be joking. Unfortunately, I don’t believe this to be true. I’ll stay away from my kitten when I get home.

  7. 2009 April 27
    Jack permalink

    It is entirely possible that this guy is practicing comedy through a fake douchebag website. Kind of reminds me of the guy in a restaurant that put up some of his credentials on the wall. Among them was a completion of anger management certificate. I spent the rest of the meal pondering if he was completely clueless or a comic genius.

  8. 2009 April 29
    Kelly from Iowa permalink

    Bill, just Bill……you win with arthur kade. Gaaaah!!! I feel ill. What an insecure jerk.

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